“Uh, she can’t hang with us, her clothes are corny!”
“That girl is not on the same level as us…her money ain’t right.”
“Her hair isn’t good like ours. Nah, she can’t hang with us.”
None of this dialogue may sound reasonable for someone to give as an excuse not to include someone in a “circle of friends,” but the attitude some women have towards other women that they deem inferior can be petty. Have you ever been a part of the “mean girl” clique?
Unfortunately, deciding on your friendship base for superficial reasons isn’t isolated to middle school and high school. Adult women participate in this level of shallow behavior. Vanity-driven realities are rampant in our society. Have you ever known a woman to say, “I only want my pretty friends to be a part of my bridal party?” This type of conversation takes place regularly. Your friends should be your friends no matter what they look like, but if you are being honest, consider the times you’ve been superficial and made a connection on nothing else other than looks. You are not alone.
In fact, some of your superficiality could be attributed to how you were brought up. When you were just a girl growing up, did your parents ever tell you what friends were best for you? “You should hang with the kids that get good grades”; “What’s her family like?”; “What religious background does she have?”; or “What type of work do her parents do?” All are seemingly innocent comments, but are they really? Could such questions have shaped your selection of best buddies? It may not be a conscious decision, but subconsciously, these implanted thoughts play a part in how you view life and who you choose to have in your inner circle.
Take a close look at yourself and those you surround yourself with. Evaluate who you consider your “girls.” Really take a good look at not only the physical, but the personalities that you’re drawn to. Do your friends possess favorable qualities beyond the external features? Can you have a deep conversation with them? If you needed your friends beyond the good times, do they have the depth in character to give you what you need?
Physical beauty is just that: physical beauty. But as looks fade and you find yourself searching for more from your circle, remember that substance is the true essence of friendship.
Subscribe to UStyle Magazine and stay Up-To-Date and In-The-Know with the latest!
